Hello, friends.
Firstly, let's get this out of the way. I am NOT hung over.
*wins*
Secondly, I am about to take a self-enforced sabbatical from my self-enforced BG blogging routine. I need these things periodically to refresh, revitalise, to become, in short, whole again.
I've also started writing over here. This is all part of the retirement plan, so if you can be bothered, get over there and start clicking through. The sooner it's a blazing success, the sooner I can rest on my laurels and talk crap back here.
In the meantime, you can contact me on info@bookgrocer.com if you have any comments, suggestions or personal-specific abuse.
Back soon. Promise.
xo
February 10, 2009
February 6, 2009
Rolled Edge
It's currently 46.4 degrees and I would happily marry one of those rotating fans.
This site is cool. I highly recommend you visit it.
http://www.rollededge.com/
This site is cool. I highly recommend you visit it.
http://www.rollededge.com/
February 2, 2009
Ashley
Last night I went here.
It was great. I met a professional cricketer whose studying Complicated Mathematics at Sydney Uni. He and his friends slated another university which they mistakenly thought I had attended. I didn't have the smarts to get in there. While they all laughed with their perfect teeth, I busily salted their food with a powerful, yet slow acting lazitive. They'll feel completely enervated by tomorrow afternoon.
Speaking of seamless segues, I was pretty enervated myself last week because it was so hot. I think I'm still wilting a little bit. Here is some local signage which shows how hot it was.
Translation: Hot.
But now it's Tuesday afternoon, I'm hung over and trying not to cry because some heartless bastard has, knowing that I'm feeling delicate, put a Cat Stevens album on. It's one of those nasty paranoid hangovers where you're all too aware of your shortcomings; like too much nose hair, or being unable to write meaningful dialogue.
I can sell books like this one, however. And you should buy it.
Email info@bookgrocer.com to express an interest, and someone will almost certainly contact you. It's $20 plus postage. DEAL!
It was great. I met a professional cricketer whose studying Complicated Mathematics at Sydney Uni. He and his friends slated another university which they mistakenly thought I had attended. I didn't have the smarts to get in there. While they all laughed with their perfect teeth, I busily salted their food with a powerful, yet slow acting lazitive. They'll feel completely enervated by tomorrow afternoon.
Speaking of seamless segues, I was pretty enervated myself last week because it was so hot. I think I'm still wilting a little bit. Here is some local signage which shows how hot it was.
Translation: Hot.
But now it's Tuesday afternoon, I'm hung over and trying not to cry because some heartless bastard has, knowing that I'm feeling delicate, put a Cat Stevens album on. It's one of those nasty paranoid hangovers where you're all too aware of your shortcomings; like too much nose hair, or being unable to write meaningful dialogue.
I can sell books like this one, however. And you should buy it.
Email info@bookgrocer.com to express an interest, and someone will almost certainly contact you. It's $20 plus postage. DEAL!
February 1, 2009
Monday Morning
Awesome. Great weekend. Back into the working week feeling great about things. Then saw that the book van, aka 'The Stallion' had been defaced overnight.
Exhibit 1
"Squiggle Nonsense"
At first, I was a little peeved. But then I read up on the internet that John F Kennedy, Ghandi, Bill Gates AND Steven Seagal all started off their respective careers by tagging up either local walls or vehicles. Kennedy was particularly mad for it, apparently. So now I feel heartened that somewhere in my local neighborhood, a young mind is on an upward swing.
Exhibit 1
"Squiggle Nonsense"
At first, I was a little peeved. But then I read up on the internet that John F Kennedy, Ghandi, Bill Gates AND Steven Seagal all started off their respective careers by tagging up either local walls or vehicles. Kennedy was particularly mad for it, apparently. So now I feel heartened that somewhere in my local neighborhood, a young mind is on an upward swing.
January 30, 2009
Sharks
Now, I can't remember if I've blogged these before or not, but I can remember they came from Defamer Australia, who clearly rule and make awesome mix CDs.
It's not quite LOLSharks, but it's getting there, isn't it?
This one is far and away my favourite. I don't need to tell you why.
HA HA!! 'YOU GOT SERVED!!'
It's not quite LOLSharks, but it's getting there, isn't it?
This one is far and away my favourite. I don't need to tell you why.
HA HA!! 'YOU GOT SERVED!!'
Saturdaze
Hi. A LITTLE LIGHT HEADED today, which I think is a result of last week's intense heat. Another contributing factor is also the extreme blood loss I suffered last night at the hands of a band of marauding mosquitoes. I think they like me, which is flattering in a completely creepy way. I woke up with a large collection of fiddy cent sized bites all over me, and now I'm scratching like an absent minded smackie.
Since we're plumbing the lows of the high 30s here today, I've decided to take things easy. So far, I have:
1) Been for an abridged and interrupted run. Fitness is failing in this heat, and I also ate two pizzas on my own last night. God, I HATE myself sometimes!
2) Cleaned the shower and the bathroom by emptying one into the other.
3) Written a letter to Victoria Police congratulating them on 'All The Good Work'. By intimating that I know more than I do, I hope to be brought on as an informant, which I gather pays well.
And now I've finished all the colouring in on the Fairfax papers' opinion pages, so it might be time to take an afternoon constitutional.
Suggestions for local Gins and Tonic early this evening are more than welcome. I would prefer a balcony and nothing too fancy - if there's celery or some shit in it I really don't want to know*.
'Over To You!'
* Hendriks and cucumber are ok. I mention this only because I'm a complete tool.
Since we're plumbing the lows of the high 30s here today, I've decided to take things easy. So far, I have:
1) Been for an abridged and interrupted run. Fitness is failing in this heat, and I also ate two pizzas on my own last night. God, I HATE myself sometimes!
2) Cleaned the shower and the bathroom by emptying one into the other.
3) Written a letter to Victoria Police congratulating them on 'All The Good Work'. By intimating that I know more than I do, I hope to be brought on as an informant, which I gather pays well.
And now I've finished all the colouring in on the Fairfax papers' opinion pages, so it might be time to take an afternoon constitutional.
Suggestions for local Gins and Tonic early this evening are more than welcome. I would prefer a balcony and nothing too fancy - if there's celery or some shit in it I really don't want to know*.
'Over To You!'
* Hendriks and cucumber are ok. I mention this only because I'm a complete tool.
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